MONDAY MARKS ONE of the most remarkable juxtapositions in the history of America: the inauguration of Donald Trump on the same day we honor Dr. Martin Luther King’s birthday. But for all the cognitive dissonance we might feel as one of our country’s most divisive figures takes office on the holiday celebrating one of its great healers, we all should consider one way to help bridge the chasm of misunderstanding and conflict in our society: the power of grace.
“Grace” has a number of meanings, many associated with religion and the Bible. On Yom Kippur—the Jewish Day of Atonement—grace invites us to reflect on our actions and seek reconciliation. Indeed, the kind of grace I’m talking about is rooted in the way we often use the term “grace period” — a type of forgiveness that is neither deserved nor earned, but offered nonetheless for another, often greater purpose.
However, we choose to define it, American society today is in desperate need of grace. Too often, it pits individuals and groups against one another. Our differences are magnified, and animosity seems to thrive. At the heart of our national identity lies a foundational belief in freedom of expression and the right to disagree. Yet in a political landscape that is almost evenly divided, discussions quickly evolve into shouting matches (both virtual and real), and our disagreements are weaponized. The result is a society where fear of backlash and retribution too often stifles honest conversation.
Dr. King didn’t say a lot about grace – but he often demonstrated it. As we know, he encouraged us to confront injustice nonviolently, and to seek common ground, even with those who oppose us. In his vision, grace was not mainly passive; it was an active choice to engage.
King also demonstrated grace through violence he endured and the many attempts on his life. While he and his family were understandably shaken and fearful after their home was bombed in 1956, instead of responding with anger or revenge, King urged his supporters to remain calm, stating that retaliating with violence would only perpetuate a cycle of hatred and suffering.
Indeed, during the Civil Rights era, King recognized that extending grace to one another opened the door to civil discourse. He did so not to guarantee progress – but to foster an environment where constructive dialogue, mutual respect, and understanding became possible.
Certainly, grace is not the same as empathy. Empathy requires us to step into someone else’s shoes, feel what they feel, and understand their struggles. Nor is grace compassion, which invites us to respond to others’ pain with kindness.
In fact, grace isn’t really about others at all – but rather a gift we extend to ourselves, because, as King famously said in 1967, “Hate is too great a burden to bear.” Indeed, when we show grace, we demonstrate our conviction that we are all human, capable of growth and failure, the ability to make mistakes and learn from them. Grace is not a form of appeasement or weakness but rather extraordinary strength.
Which brings us back to Donald Trump’s inauguration. No matter which “side” we find ourselves on—MAGA diehard or card-carrying member of the resistance, or somewhere in between—there will be no shortage of opportunities to show anger and vitriol next week.
Instead, we should show grace.
To be clear, I’m not suggesting we forgive those who break the law – or look the other way in the face of severe moral or ethical lapses. Grace is not about freeing those who went to jail for storming the Capitol on January 6 four years ago – or those who set fire to storefronts during Black Lives Matter marches. Rather, it is about recognizing the excesses nearly all of us have indulged in over the last eight years at one time or another – and that excusing heinous actions in a Facebook post or voting for someone distasteful isn’t the same as committing those crimes.
So, as we inaugurate our next president on Monday and prepare for difficult years ahead, instead than taking actions that deepen our divisions, let us honor Dr. King’s legacy by offering a moment of grace. Let us take a small step toward contributing to a more harmonious country, so that civil discourse can again be a source of strength for our collective future.
In a world that too often feels chaotic and divisive, grace can be our guiding principle, illuminating a path towards unity and healing. If not for those who receive it, then at least for ourselves.
Colette A.M. Phillips is president and CEO of a public relations and inclusion, allyship and diversity consulting firm in Boston. Her book, The Includers: The 7 Traits of Culturally Savvy, Anti-Racist Leaders, is published by BenBella Books. She is a member of CommonWealth Beacon’s advisory board.
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